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The Roles We Play by Sailor Panda

Chapter One

Her yukata clad form knelt by the grassy edge of the pond, enjoying the way the moonlight made the watery surface shimmer as the slight spring breeze caused it to ripple with gentle undulating motions and the leaves adorning the trees surrounding her rustled soothingly. With the dark cloak of night studded with diamond twinkling stars overhead, it was a perfect setting for some contemplation and relaxation, far from any other intelligent signs of life that would disturb the quiet solitude. Or so it would appear on the surface.

Knowing better, Kagome sighed, tilting her head up to take in the sight of the glittering stars overhead as her voice, laced with resignation, broke through the stillness of the night.

"You really shouldn't be here, you know."

"The western lands are my domain," a low masculine tone responded, seeming to echo all around her. "It is my right to go wherever I please."

"Well, I have a different opinion about that but, at the very least, could you please stop hiding in the shadows? It's unsettling talking to someone that I can't see."

"I do not 'hide' as you so put it. But it is interesting that you say that you cannot see me," he said as he stepped into full view, "and yet you can sense my presence. Why is it that you are so unsettled when you know that I am here even if I am not within sight?"

"I've told you before, you're always unsettling whether you're in plain view or not. But I prefer being able to see with my eyes the person whom I talk to."

"Foolish human."

As the words were said without any real inflection behind them, she let it go. Instead, she dropped her eyes down to her lap, studying the threads of her yukata, for she had long ago decided to trade in her school uniform for something less eye-catching to the people in this era, as she contemplated what to say next. Finally, she lifted her gaze to him, finding that he had suddenly moved closer while she had been gathering her thoughts. Now he was standing right next to her, feet planted mere inches away, towering over her while he looked down at her from his height made taller by her kneeling position which only became more uncomfortable with the intense way he was gazing at her.

"You really shouldn't be here," she repeated as she broke eye contact with him.

"You do not mean that."

"Yes, I do."

"No, you do not. For if you truly desired that, then you would not be here either. Because you know that I would come here if you did so as well."

She blushed. "I only came to tell you not to."

"Really?" One brow arched skeptically. "Is that all you came here for?"

"Yes! We can't keep meeting each other like this."

"Why not?"

"It's wrong. You said so yourself, once before."

"Yes, I do recall words to that effect. However, that was a very long time ago and my sentiments then are not what they are now."

"Maybe so. But meeting in secret like this is still wrong."

"Is it?"

"Don't joke! You know how others feel about youkai and humans mixing."

"Yes, I do. I who make it my business to have some knowledge of everything – how could I not? But must we also fall into the roles that others have devised in order to keep their race pure? As I am sure you well know, I do not care to follow the laws, unwritten or not, that someone else has defined unless it suits my tastes to do so. I prefer to fashion my own rules by which to live according to how I see fit."

"Spoken like a true dictator."

"Do not think it is only me," he admonished. "You, after all, are not the type to let a minor thing such as one's race affect how you act towards another. You do not judge others by the slots society has designated to them, do you?"

Instead of replying to that, she merely said again, "We really have to stop."

"It's what you always say and yet," he was suddenly kneeling, on eye-level with her, "your words hold a ring of untruth. You are too direct and honest to play well at the game of deceit. Ceasing is not what you truly desire, is it?"

"Yes, it is."

Her tone came out weak, wavering, lacking the conviction she tried to infuse into it. How could it not? With his heated gaze staring at her from so close, mere inches away, penetrating her to her very core while moonlight bathed his features and highlighted his beauty, she couldn't muster up enough willpower to put the right amount of certainty into her voice to back up her words. And she knew that he would never let her lie, not about this.

She swallowed hard. "Sesshoumaru," she grimaced slightly at the husky sound of her voice, "we can't do this anymore."

"You really must find a more convincing line to say," he breathed, his hot breath wafting across her face at such a close distance. "Though I find your role of distressed lady quite arousing."

And then he kissed her.

Kagome had been kissed before, many times - by others, by him...but it was always new when it was him, always managed to somehow take her by surprise. And this was no different because he was the only one who ever kissed her like this.

Sesshoumaru didn't just kiss her – he consumed. His mouth was hard, voracious, and relentless on hers. He threaded a hand through her hair and slanted her head to the side, sealing their mouths more tightly together. He ate at her lips, his fangs grazing her, his mouth seducing a response that Kagome strove not to give while his arms wrapped around her, pulling her closer until she was flush against him.

It took all her effort to stay rigid and immune in his arms, to deny the fiery longing that he was stoking inside her. She tried to hide behind a wall of indifference, pretend his kiss didn't affect her, that she didn't care, that this dominant display of his didn't sway her in the slightest. But her act didn't last long, crumbled like an old wall impacted by a cannon ball, and she doubted he'd been fooled for even a second.

His mouth devoured hers, savage and demanding, completely opposite of the cool and restrained façade he first arrived with, and the way her heart staggered in response to him labeled her an absolute liar. Her body arched into his of its own accord, her soft feminine curves eager to be pressed into his hard male contours and her pliancy against him despite her previous protests branded her a liar most of all.

The hand around her waist moved, the tips of his claws dragged slowly, slowly up over the rounded indentation of her waist, the outer swell of her breast, the delicate shelf of her shoulder. His hand settled beneath her chin, his index finger and thumb clamping around her jaw, forcing her head higher to meet him.

He sucked her lower lip into his mouth, ran his tongue over the moist trembling velvet flesh. He nibbled on her with his teeth, his fangs, sparking the most delicious pleasure-pain sensations until Kagome weakened and mewled and melted against him.

His tongue drew over the seam of her tightly closed lips in a wet pulling slide and she couldn't have stopped herself from opening for him if she had tried. But she couldn't even try, she didn't have the strength; he'd toppled her resistance like a tornado blowing away a pile of pebbles.

He licked her lips, alternating between the upper and lower in turn with slow, very slow gliding caresses. He stroked with firmness, reserve, control.

But not for long.

He growled deep in his throat and his claws curled in a fistful of her inky dark hair as he plunged into her mouth like a marauder. The tip of his tongue made deep possessive sweeps, sending her head spinning off into the clouds as he devoured her mouth with his as if he were trying to swallow her whole.

Suddenly, he pulled back, the kiss ending as abruptly as it had begun. Sesshoumaru's claws uncurled from her silky hair as he looked at her, his eyes dark with passion, his expression calm though a hint of triumph peeked through his façade. His chest rose and fell erratically against her as he struggled to catch his breath and she might have been gratified at her visible effect on him if her breathing hadn't been as equally unstable.

"Do you still resist?"

His words, affected by his desire, came out in a low husky rumbling. She tried desperately to ignore the sexy sound and the effect on her senses as she shakily replied.

"Y-yes."

"Then I will just have to put more effort into changing your mind, will I not?"

She thought he was doing a pretty good job of that so far but, hearing his undeterred tone, she didn't think it wise to tell him that. Then he bent back to her and all thoughts were flung away, sent flying apart like a house of cards caught in a sudden gale.

His mouth crashed down on hers; hot, devouring, demanding no less than her total surrender. His tongue plunged inside her mouth, mating with hers in a frenzied fury that left her hot and breathless while his hands roved up and down her back restlessly, as if her were impatient to feel all of her at once.

He wrapped his arms around her, pinned her close to his chest, and then lowered them onto the carpet of cool crushed grass, all the while keeping the frantic pitch of their kiss without even once breaking contact. He stretched his length out beside her, grinding the hard evidence of his need against the roundness of her hip. Then he worked his knee between her legs and lifted until her thighs straddled his and she instinctively arched into the intimate caress of his leg. And, still kissing her voraciously, he swallowed her husky groan as well as his own.

Desire flowed in bright flickering flames within Kagome's blood as she tightened her legs around him. The imprint of his hand seared through her yukata, through her skin, as it traversed a heat inducing path from her waist and upwards. And her breasts swelled, nipples tightening in sensitive anticipation of his touch, almost begging for it with wordless plea.

That this might be wrong, that she shouldn't want him, none of it seemed to matter at this moment for it didn't change a thing. And that was that she did need him no matter what any kind of rules had to say about it. But such things were very distant to her for his touch obliterated all else but him.

His kiss, his touch, they were like some exquisite seductive brand of youkai magic designed to crumble all her defenses. Both consumed her protests no matter how weak and feeble they were. Then his hand closed over her breast, a the nail of one claw flicking the rigid nipple through the cloth of her yukata, and whatever resistance she might have still clung too melted away, transformed into heat and raw sensation.

She moaned, back arching, fingers curling inward and digging into his steely biceps, penetrating the sleeves of his attire. Her chin came up when his lips left hers, trying to follow as if unwilling to relinquish his taste, and she shivered when his open mouth settled, hot and moist, on the side of her neck. The strokes of his tongue, of his thigh between her legs, all served to heighten her excitement, electrified every nerve in her body.

His tongue laved a hot, moist path over her jaw, down her throat, her collarbone, lower. His claws left her only long enough to tear at the opening of her yukata and to part the fabric wide, baring her to the night air. His hand shook with his own excitement as it slipped over her and, wanting to feel her naked against him, he impatiently tore at his own clothes until his upper torso was as bare as hers and he could feel her flesh, hot and hungry pressed to his own.

He lowered his head, teased a nipple with tongue and teeth until she groaned and shuddered against him. She couldn't help but tremble as even his long silky hair caressed her, sliding over her in pale waves, and she curled her fingers around thick fistfuls of it, using it to anchor his head to her. Her mind was in a daze as all she could focus on was him, the only one who could create this kind of raging inferno within her with his glance, his touch.

Only him.

His mouth closed around her, suckling, nibbling. His hand drifted down, hesitated for a heartbeat on the slight curve of her abdomen, then resumed its stray lower down. He flattened his hand on the softness of her inner thigh, the tip of one claw carefully grazing her moist heat.

"You're hot for me; very, very hot. Can you feel it?" His mouth traveled upward, tongue lingering on the pulse leaping wildly at the base of her throat. "Can you?"

"Yes," she sighed breathily at his demanded response.

What else could she say? It was the truth.

His weight shifted as he propped himself on his elbow, looming above her as his hand continued to play with her, making her body weep for him even more. Her eyes, which had been closed, flickered open, her dark-eyed gaze locking onto his of molten gold.

"Do you want me inside of you?" he asked huskily, his words hanging on the night air.

The hand that had been teasing her shifted, making her moan at the loss, moving to his waist as he removed his remaining clothes, slipping them off his lower torso until his body was bared. Her breath caught at the sight of the perfection he presented, his lean muscular form bathed by moonlight's glow as he stared down at her with regal demand, his narrowed eyes piercing her right to the core.

"Do you?" he demanded imperiously.

And she was helpless, weak with her own yearning, and could only reply in breathless words, "Yes. Yes, please, Sesshoumaru. Please, now. Now!"

He growled, low and deep, the vibrations of it rumbling through her as he sandwiched himself between her legs. The taut muscles of his body hummed with barely leashed restraint and yet, even when she arched insistently beneath him, he didn't fulfill the promise the way their bodies begged for him to. He held himself back, tense with the effort, teasing her with the possibility of what could be.

Questioningly, she glanced up but his eyes were inscrutable, searching in a way as they bored into her with an intensity that had her shivering and longing even more for him as she watched him. One strong arm held his crushing weight above hers while his other hand cradled her abdomen possessively. Under her heated gaze, a shudder ran through him as his control shredded and he could hold back no longer, no longer desired to and his hips arched forward, driving into her in one breathtaking stroke.

"Mine."

He rasped the word through teeth gritted and bared in a feral grin as he pulled back, almost withdrew completely with the tip of him barely at her entrance, then thrust into her. Again and again; quickly, deeply, penetrating as far as he could go and drawing mewling cries from her with every stroke.

"Mine. Say it. Say that you are mine. Say it!"

She didn't say it, she whispered it, her voice too far gone to accomplish anything else so overcome with the sensations thrumming through her as she was. She felt every pulse of his body, every tantalizing stroke as he plumbed her very depths. Her body's response was hot and breathless, weeping copiously with his every movement, the fire in her building in her quicker than anything she'd ever felt before. In no time, the barest of instances it seemed, he had her shivering and teetering on the brink of madness.

"Yours," she murmured huskily.

She didn't care if she was conceding to him, didn't care about roles or resistance as she wrapped her legs around him, hooking them high on his waist, coaxing him deeper into her. She only cared about him, could only think about him as her fingernails dug shallow ribbons into the smooth hard flesh of his back and she arched beneath him, drawing him in even deeper still.

"Yours," she repeated. Then pleaded, "Sesshoumaru, please don't stop."

"I will not stop," he growled in response as he lowered himself carefully over her. "I cannot."

And that was the truth.

Nothing could stop him now. Her wonderful body, the way it was milking him dry, captured all his senses and made him incapable of doing anything else but focusing on her. The feel of her shuddering around him was the better than any other sensation he had ever known and he could have gladly died from the pleasure of it right then and there. Stopping was impossible; he didn't have the strength for that now, if he ever had such a power to begin with. Buried inside the sweetest, hottest, tightest place he'd ever known, a place he never wanted to leave, there was nothing else he wanted but her. And though he hungered for release, his body clamoring for it, needing it more than he needed air...he didn't take it, he wouldn't.

Not without her.

He'd wanted her resistance to crumble, and he had that. But it wasn't enough. He wanted her soaring higher than she'd ever gone before, wanted her head reeling, wanted her body burning with a fire he'd lit and that only he, Sesshoumaru, could douse.

Nothing less would do.

There was only one in her entire life that Kagome had wanted to make love to her forever, and that was him. And as the first spasms of release rippled through her, with some vague idea of prolonging the exquisite torment, she fought them, tried to hold back as she clung to him desperately. If she gave in to the wild sensations coursing through her then it would be over too soon...and she didn't want it to be over, not ever. It felt too wonderful, too good, too perfect and right.

Sesshoumaru felt her shiver, heard her moan, and knew she was close. She was also holding back, retreating, he that instinctively the same way that he knew he wouldn't let her, he couldn't. He was barely holding on as he was and knew he couldn't last for much longer; she felt too good and he needed what her body promised him too much to let her escape.

Clinging to what was left to his tattered self-control, he levered himself up on his elbows and held his body dead still as he cupped her face in his faintly trembling hands.

"No," he whispered huskily.

His breaths came, ragged and sharp, as he rested his forehead against hers, silky white strands mixing with black, and noticed that both were damp with perspiration. Her hips arched, begging him to move inside her once more and he barely resisted falling into her silent demand as he wanted to.

"Do not hold back." He looked down at her closed-eyed features. "You know better than that." He leaned down until their lips were just a hair's breadth away, his words whispering across her flesh. "Give in."

His hands strayed down, cupping her hips. He lifted her and felt her legs tighten around him as he began to withdraw. He paused on the very threshold of her, teasing her, holding her steady when she would have pulled him back, and waited impatiently for her eyes to open and for her to look at him.

It didn't take long.

The instant dark chocolate brown clashed with passionately burning gold, glowing commandingly, he arched forward and buried himself to the hilt in her soft, heated wetness.

"Now, Kagome. Now!"

She couldn't resist his command; she had no choice. His long, sure strokes saw to that, splintering whatever resistance she had as his body fed the flames of the fire he'd sparked within her, making her burn wildly. There was no fighting the white-hot release when it swept through her, crashed over her. She let it come, let it wrap around her, enfold her, carry her higher and higher to the place that only he could take her, a place filled to overflowing with wild, wonderful, raw sensations that made her cling to him and cry out his name as the shudders of relief tore through her.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Her voice rang in his ears, right along with his thundering heartbeat as his climax came, swift and jarring and long. The intensity of it ripped through him, making him shudder violently as he arched forward for that last, piercing thrust while her spasms of release cradled him, drained him as she quivered around him. Sensation seemed to spiral on forever, but a distant part of his mind knew that was only because he wished that such a thing were so.

Then, as the strength drained out of his arms, feeling weak and shaken and more content than he could believe possible, he eased himself to the crushed grass at her side before he collapsed atop her in exhaustion. Then he automatically scooped her warm, pliant form against his side, enjoying the way she molded to him, fit him, as though their bodies had been carved for each other.

SMACK!

Sesshoumaru, stoic youkai lord of the western lands who braved any battle, any danger, without flinching, winced at the sharp pain that slapped itself on his bare chest. Frowning, he looked at the source of his pain.

"What was that for?"

She scowled. "Jerk. If I had known the ideas it would put into your head, I would never have told you about role-playing games."

"I did not hear you complaining overly much," he responded with a small smirk. "Especially not towards the end."

She blushed. "I got caught up in it. So what?" Her expression was mutinous. "I still don't like playing the role of protesting maiden."

"Why not? Did it not bring back nostalgic recollections of the past?"

"Excuse me?" A dark brow winged upwards in disdain. "Your memory must be getting faulty in your old age. I never acted that weak - so totally unresisting. Or have you forgotten who chased who?" She snorted delicately. "Honestly! If I had let you, you would have gone off and buried your head in the sand, determined to prove that you didn't need anyone in your life or the so-called 'weaker' emotions that came with it." She rolled her eyes. "Youkai pride is such a pain."

Though his pride was pricked, he merely chuckled. "As you will, wife." Contentment rumbled in his tone.

"Anyway," she huffed as she returned to her original topic, "I feel silly playing these games. We're not children."

"How odd. I was under the impression that the games we play are very much for adults."

"Sesshoumaru! You know what I mean!"

"Calm yourself, wife." With one hand, he rubbed soothing circles on her lower back while the other came up to gently cup the swelling of her abdomen. "Temper is not good for the child."

"Well, it's your fault I'm like this – so blame yourself!"

He smiled indulgently. "Oh, I do. Quite happily." The warm hand stroking the roundness where his unborn child dwelled left no mistake as to his meaning. "I would rather have the blame for this than give it over to someone else."

At the inherent possessiveness in his tone, and his obvious pleasure in the growing bundle of life she carried, Kagome felt some of her irritation abate. In her mind, packed with the modern ideals of equality for the sexes from her world, she knew it was wrong to take such delight in something so primitive. But she could never help herself from melting whenever she heard it in his voice, possessiveness laced with love, even after all these years, the proof that he still cared so much about her.

She sighed, suddenly feeling much mellower. It never ceased to amaze her the way he could calm her, even if he was the one to incite her emotions in the first place. But she also knew that it wasn't just him; pregnancy tended to make her moods shift drastically and the tiniest of things set her off. Lucky for her, Sesshoumaru wasn't the type to let something like that deter him from being with her, even when she was in high temper and screaming that she never wanted to see him again. She winced at the memory that invoked and wished fervently that pregnancy induced mood swings weren't so embarrassing in the recollection.

Honestly, one would think she would have gotten the hang of it by now after the previous two trials.

"Feeling better?" he murmured affectionately.

"Mm-hmm."

Actually, with the soothing motions of his hands as he smoothed his touch over her, she was feeling quite boneless and extremely relaxed and immensely grateful for the pleasure he could bestow with his fingers. Who would have thought the imperial youkai lord would be so gifted at the skill of massage?

Drowsily, she sent a brief silent prayer up to whatever power that had given Sesshoumaru back his other arm. He never did tell her how he'd managed to regain his other limb no matter how much she'd tried to pry the information out of him these past years. To her, however, his silence on the subject spoke volumes to her and she was pretty sure she wouldn't like what she found out, no doubt the reason he'd kept so close-mouthed about it for so long. But she was determined to eventually worm the information from him one day no matter how strongly he resisted, even if it took another few years.

Besides, it gave her something to do.

"Why is it that I feel your thoughts have taken an ominous turn?" he spoke, tone dry.

She gave him her most angelic expression. "It's just your imagination."

"You do realize you have always been a terrible liar?"

"After spending so much time with you, I'd hoped I would have gotten better at it over the years."

"I do not lie; I omit."

"Splitting hairs, dear. Splitting hairs."

"Truly, I do not like these sayings of yours."

"You only say that when they irritate you – and you know I'm right."

"Hmph."

She smiled at him teasingly, feeling playful. "And I know for a fact you don't dislike all the sayings of my world. You seem to like 'make-up sex' well enough."

"Yes, well, perhaps not all are completely worthless."

"Just like a male," she muttered good-naturedly. "Stick sex into something and everything's fine."

"May I remind you that you seem to take your own share of enjoyment in it, as well?"

Her blush was renewed. "I think it's great without the role-playing."

"Come now, it was your choice to be a protesting maiden. You did not like it when I suggested being a miko."

She scowled. "Because I didn't want to get dressed up like one the way you wanted."

"I did not think it would be such an issue. You are, after all, a miko."

"Not a formal one. So there's no need for me to dress like one either."

"Truly, it matters little to me either way. You know I would never force you to do something you truly did not wish to do as long as it would not place you in harm's way. You have but only to ask."

It made her feel a little guilty, those words, and she resisted the urge to squirm. Not liking it, she switched tactics and sighed, "What would others think if they knew of this fetish of yours for playing games?"

His brows snapped together in a frown. "I do not think of it as a 'fetish.'"

She wisely restrained a giggle at his miffed tone, but it was difficult. There were some times when she thought he was simply adorable though she usually didn't tell him that because it tended to offend him for some reason. She chalked it up to those mysteries of man-woman relationships that never seemed to be solved no matter how much wisdom one acquired with life's experiences. Briefly, she wondered if his need to make love to her outdoors every once in a while was also one of those mysteries – or maybe it was one of those canine things that plagued inu-youkai with the wild need to be in more primitive surroundings. But, of course, she didn't mention that to him since she knew it annoyed him whenever she made the slightest references to him and dogs.

She blinked, suddenly noticing the suspicion in his gaze as he looked at her. She felt a tingle of nervousness work through her as she wondered if he had picked up on her thoughts somehow as he managed to do at times during unexpected moments.

"It is not a fetish," he proclaimed emphatically.

She relaxed; he hadn't picked up on her train of thought after all. "Okay."

"You concede too easily; I expected you to prolong your teasing." His eyes narrowed. "It makes me wonder what you were thinking of before."

She gave a nervous laugh. "You know, we really should be getting back home. I want to check on the kids."

"Do not think you will escape so easily, wife. You know very well that Jaken is looking after the children so there is no need for worry."

She frowned. "You do realize what you just said, right?"

He frowned, too. "Perhaps we should return home, after all."

"No kidding. Jaken makes an okay baby-sitter for short durations but, if I had known beforehand that he was the one you left in charge of the kids, I wouldn't have let so much time go by."

"I am sure Jaken is managing ably on his own."

Nevertheless, despite his words of assurance, Sesshoumaru hastened to dress. And it was with no small amount of wistful regret that Kagome watched as his beautiful body was once more hidden from view by his garments even as she shrugged into her own discarded yukata.

Later, she promised herself, when she had seen for herself that the kids were okay, then she could get back to other, more pleasanter matters.

Hand in hand, they made their way over the grassy land darkened by the fall of night, picking their way over natural obstacles illuminated by the light emanating from overhead and lighting their path. They walked companionably, the knowledge that came from years of knowing each other settling comfortably between them as they made their journey back to the home and family they had created together. Peacefulness and contentment flowed easily between them.

That is, until Sesshoumaru commented, "So what game shall we play next?"

~owari~

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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