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Woman-child's Curiosity by kiltykat

Woman-child's Curiosity

I honestly don't know when it started, this woman-child's fascination with me. And I don't know why I didn't just kill her then. But for some reason unbeknownst to myself I allowed her to follow me around as I viewed her in barely veiled disgust, as she shot question upon question to get to 'know' me. She was my brother's wench and I refused to open myself to this human, foolish as she was. Did she not know that I Sesshoumaru told nothing of myself, for there was nothing to tell? I was a creature unaffected by time, forever alone with the emptiness of my being.

"Hey Sesshoumaru?"

I of course gave her no answer, why should I? It was beneath me to even look at her, even more so to speak to her. When I felt the unfamiliar touch on my person I swirled around to give her a look of cool distain.

"What, could you possibly want now human?"

I watched as she chewed her bottom lip, something I found she often did when she was upset about something, not that I paid her any attention. Her smooth brow was creased upon the slight wrinkling of her nose at the contempt she held for the name I put upon her. How many times had she told him her name? It mattered not because he refused to give her that honor, or the respect of him actually saying it.

"Sesshoumaru..." She sighed then, "You know I don't like it when you call me human."

I raised one eyebrow then, almost surprised that she'd be brave enough to voice that thought. But then again, this was her that he was talking about. The creature that had so foolishly defied him so many times before. Curious creatures that humans were.

"If you do not find that suitable I'm sure that wench would be much better."

"You're just like your brother..."

She had muttered under her breath. He had tensed up in that moment. How dare she compare him, Sesshoumaru, to that hanyou? It was disgraceful. But the sadness that had engulfed her voice in that moment made him hold his tongue with the insult that threatened to spill forth from his lips. But he was the master of himself, and fought the remark into submission.

"You know very well I am not my brother. I am alive."

It was true, Inuyasha had died, much to my joy, and in return for the fang of my fathers I was given his wench. Not a fair trade if you asked him. He still couldn't hold the sword and he was faced with her. Quite the annoying creature she was, and worst of it was, you couldn't just scare her away. So foolish was she that she couldn't decipher the creatures that were to fear between the ones that weren't.

"I know..."

The smell of salt invaded his senses, and he ignored the silent tears the girl behind him shed. It was no concern of his rather the wench missed his brother or not. And she was not forced to be here, so if she could not handle his double-edged blade of a tongue then she could gladly leave. She would not be missed...

If he had, had an ounce of compassion in him, then he would have been moved by her heart wrenching sobs behind him. But that was not a creature he was, it wasn't his type. He was a cold-blooded killer, thought nothing of life, the weak were meant to be killed. He didn't believe it to be cruel, but he could not help how others viewed it.

"Human... cease these tears. They're un-needed."

She smiled in that moment, rather small mind you, but smiled. A small watery smile, just for him. Of course he didn't care for it. He merely scoffed at her and her emotions that she so freely wore on her sleeve. She nodded at him in understanding and wiped her eyes after that.

"Thank-you Sesshoumaru..."

That one had surprised him on some level. Thank him for what? He hadn't meant to 'cheer her up' if that was what she was thinking. To think, him Sesshoumaru caring for salted water falling from a humans eyes. Pathetic... He'd kill her first.

"Girl, you misunderstand. I care not for your human tears, nor for you."

He saw her wince and turn away from him. He let a smirk fall upon his face. So she was finally learning the true him huh? Good, the sooner she found out, the sooner he'd be rid of her. How long had she been here with him now? Let's see now... Inuyasha died about, 10 moon cycles ago. He found her a few days after his death, hunched over his rotting corpse, holding onto him, as would a leech. She had followed him ever since, still as annoying as ever.

"Sesshoumaru?"

I looked at her then, a blush staining her cheeks as she stared into my eyes. I didn't know what she was about to say, but it made me feel... different. I guess one would call it discomfort.

"What now?"

She darted her eyes away and shrunk down somewhat before saying, "What would you say if I told you I loved you?"

I glared at her then. And she blushed a deeper shade of red and turned her body from him. Love? Did she not know demons couldn't love? Or at least this demon? Besides the love of a human was simply disgraceful, it bruised his pride. With as cold a voice he could muster he said, "Human, what you speak of is dangerous and I suggest you hold your tongue."

With that I walked away from her.


For some time after that I was blessed. It would seem as if the woman had left me, too embarrassed to face me. But as I strolled in the garden one day there she sat, staring at nothing, foolish creature. The world would smile to be rid of her. But once she saw me, she blushed a light shade of pink, and stood up, brushing off her kimono. She walked up to me and smiled before saying, "Hello Sesshoumaru. My apologies for my absence here lately."

I gave her one of my bored stares and said, "Trust me human, you weren't missed."

At least, that's what I made her think... she'd never know the truth. I'd never let her get the chance.

For a moment it appeared to have deflated the child, but then she just smiled at him and walked next to him as he strolled along his gardens. He ignored her as she prattled on about something he didn't catch, but didn't particularly care about either. He was doing a good job before she asked that infernal question again.

"Sesshoumaru... what would you say if I told you I love you?"

What would make her ask that? Why would she love him when he had been nothing if not cruel to her? Was she hoping that by some chance he could ever love her back? Or maybe she just made him up to be Inuyasha and fell in love with that. Or was it possible that she loved him, for him? All these thoughts were meaningless because he hated her.

"I already told you how I felt about this human."

I was hoping that, like last time, she would run off and leave me alone. But I was never so lucky. She merely smiled, knowingly, and continued to walk by my side, thankfully silent. She spent her days by my side talking to me, hoping for me to respond with more than a 'grunt' as she put it, and every time I ignored her. And every week she'd ask that question, and every time I'd answer in the same way. After many moon cycles she just shrugged it off and continued talking animatedly about some idiotic subject of no importance. She had a problem of doing that. Talking without having a clue what it was she was prattling on about. I believe now that she feared silence, so her voice comforted her. Which was no concern of mine.

Somehow, the wench had found her way into my mind, not my heart, my mind, and I would find myself almost missing her presence when it was not there. Hearing her voice when it was not present. To say that I was livid was an understatement. Many trees were cut down to lessen the 'minor annoyance'. But cutting greenery can only pacify one for so long, and I feared I had gone mad.

"Sesshoumaru, what would you say if I told you that I loved you?"

Why did she always ask me that question? Every week it was the same, it became habitual. Every week I felt myself loose some of that all so famed self-control that I supposedly had on myself. Did she not know she was causing me to go insane? If only she were to die, then no longer would I think of her. She would disappear. And I could be happy... alone, and happy.

One week while walking she had asked me that question again and I felt my control slip, I crashed my lips upon hers while I held down her arms. Not a kiss of passion, but a kiss of silence, she talked too much and it was tiring. As much as I hated the creature I didn't want her to die, at least by my own hand. Unfortunately for her... I felt nothing. As soon as I realized what I was doing I released her. She needed to leave, and so I told her so.

"Human... leave. I am unsure of what I will do if this continues."

That was a lie, I knew exactly what would happen.

Of course she had to object and be stubborn. She always was difficult, and now she seemed to think that because I kissed her, that I cared for her. How absolutely human of her to think that.

"No."

"Human..."

"Sesshoumaru, what would you say if I told you I love you?"

I felt my eyes redden at that and my control slip once more. All was a blur after that...


So even now, as her blood runs over my hands I feel nothing for her. She was just a foolish human who pushed her luck a little too far, tried to 'play' with my inner demon, the wrong demon. Patience is a virtue that will only get you so far, and when it runs out... well, look at the results.

So even as her body grows cold to the touch, and I run one razor sharp claw against chilled cheek, I feel nothing. Nothing at all...

The tightening in my chest is not for her... the sick feeling in my stomach isn't because I killed her...

Memories of her don't dance inside my head...

I cared nothing for her as I buried her next to where I was to be buried, in my mates respectful place.

I cared nothing for her as I placed her favorite flowers on her grave, how I knew they were her favorite I don't know.

Maybe I paid more attention than I thought. And even now as I walk away I feel nothing for her. That woman-child and her curiosity that led to her demise. To my insanity...

At least that's what I tell myself...

"Sesshoumaru..."

And even now her voice still haunts me...

"What do you want?"

"What would you say if I told you I loved you?"

I thought about the question for the first time. What would I say to her, now that she was no longer here to hear it?

"I don't know..."

'Kagome...'

Some things are best left unsaid...


I hope you enjoyed my little one-shot! Feel free to R&R!

Suicidal Child

My legs are shaking from cool steel against my flesh.

My life is in MY hands, so choose now life or death?

I have a choice to make, life in heaven, or hell on Earth?

And way you spin it; my life has no potential worth.

In heaven I will live forever, on Earth my soul will die.

And tears will pour when people die, the loved ones cry.

I have no choice in life now, looks like I'm gonna die.

No more hell on Earth, no more heaven thoughts as well.

Trapped, suffocating, stuck in my coffin cell.

In this damn box, I feel I'm going wild

Because nobody wants the soul of a suicidal child.

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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