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Crying out to you by Shinigami Clara

Crying out to you

Crying out to You

When had this started? How had it started? He did not know, nor did he care, all he knew was that he was at the edge of the line, the cliff. There was nothing he can do but to fall into that void that would mean his ruin, yes, his ruin, yet he could not stop himself, could not deny his very soul calling to him... for her...for them.

When had he and her become a them? When had the two separate beings melded together in his mind? He growled, a low sound rumbling form deep in his chest, he could smell in the distance, earth, bones and death. So similar yet so different, one full of life while the other was nothing but a shell of the original existence. It amazed and disgusted him how his idiot of a half brother could find good in something constructed wholly of hate and revenge, it was something he would never understand; but nor did he understand his feelings for her.

He refused to say her name, in fear that in doing so, this obsession would become solidified, something he dreaded yet yearned. This yearning went so deep that he almost gave in to it, but he could not, he would not, for to give up would mean his death and death to those in his care. But his mind whispered seduction, a promise in return for his surrender, a promise of sweet, sweet victory never felt before. How can one argue with his mind and body, when all his soul cried for was submission?

She had melted the layer of ice incasing his heart, even without knowing, it was her compassion, her love of life and everything good that had done this to him. Yet he could not blame her, all he could blame, was himself; for reaching out to her-even if it's only with his soul, for letting her enter his frozen heart that is now warming once again with heat. Aye, he knew to surrender was what he wanted, but to do so, would be his ruin, his downfall.... or would it?

His thoughts were cut short by her scent invading his senses, lilac and waterfall, sweet and heavenly, only to be marred by the tang of tears and sorrow. His heart clenched in pain with her as she let out a heart-wrenching sob, he longed to comfort her, to take away from her the tears that now run freely down her face. But he controlled his urge, controlled the beast inside of him that demanded the blood of the one that made her shed tears, demanded that he hold her in his arms until she cried no longer.

The woman-child that captured his heart now sobbed her sorrow out to the world, no longer did she, could she, hold her tears from the dark sky, from him. He had seen her smile through her tears; smile through the assaults that were given to her day-by-day. Being compared to one already dead, feeling her heart slowly die and not being able to stop such a heart-ach, how to do so when the one you called a friend had done nothing but insult and shame you?

Then she turned, to where he was, sensing his presence, looking through emotionless eyes at her, "Sesshoumaru," her voice was tired; laced with sorrow that he wanted nothing but to destroy.

He jumped down from the branch he was sitting at and looked down at her, he could not fall for this human, though beautiful and pure as she was, she deserved better, he could never have her, not him and certainly not his brother, "Where his Inuyasha?" he asked, voice as emotionless as his expression.

She looked away, "I don't know."

He growled, deep in his throat, "Woman, do not lie to me! You know where he is."

Then, Kagome looked at him, anger in her eyes, grief as well, but anger dominated, "I told you! I do not know! Even if I did, I would not tell you! I cannot let you kill him!"

He saw the pain and betrayal in her eyes, but there was determined as well, and his own golden orbs softened in return, shocking her, Sesshoumaru knew it was hopeless to fight this pull he had towards her, finally, he let go, surrendered to this shining blue gaze. Slowly, he reached out a hand to her cheek and saw her flinch, hurt laced through him and he let his hand drop, his eyes understanding, but no less pain filled, so much that Kagome instantly felt guilty.

Never in her dreams would she think that Sesshoumaru, Taiyoukai of the west would act such in front of her, with all his walls down, slowly, as if uncontrolled, her arms went around the youkai lord's neck.

"Why?" he asked, "Why do you do this, protect the hanyou when you know that he will only betray you in return? I have seen how he treats you, and yet you do nothing but hide your tears behind your smile and move on like it does not matter to you. But I have seen you; I have seen you walking in solitude, your eyes dull but for the heart-ach that even now tears at you heart. Tell me why."

Kagome smiled sadly at him, "He was my first friend in this forsaken place 500 years before my time, he was my first love, though I no longer feel for him the same way as I used to, I would protect him even if it means my life, my soul."

Then he crushed her to him, holding her firmly yet gently against him, her body relaxed and melted into his arms. Kagome took in his sent, musky and all male; she buried her face in his chest, glad to have someone who loved her, to hold her in his arms, Sesshoumaru was different from the last time they had met, she felt it, something in his eyes and body language changed and caught her attention. His eyes were filled with hopeless love... for her.

Kagome felt something stir in response to his warmth, and his unannounced love, something in her that she didn't realize; it was like nothing she had felt with Inuyasha, different, yet it was so much warmer than anything she had experienced. "Kagome" he murmured, his face buried in her dark tresses, taking in her scent, he repeated her name over and over again, like a benediction.

Then, he pulled away, their eyes met, and they stared into each other's depths, entranced. Slowly, as if afraid to scare her away, Sesshoumaru lowered his head, though he did not need to fear, Kagome didn't think she could pull away even if she wanted, and she definitely did not want to. Sesshoumaru's lips were now inches away from hers, their eyes still locked; finally, he lowered the last inch. Their lips met and Kagome gasped at the contact, bolts of lightning shot through her entire body, she was painfully aware of any contact points she had with the western lord.

Sesshoumaru took advantage of her gasp and surged into her waiting mouth, exploring her waiting caverns, he growled in pleasure knowing that no one has kissed her before like this, she was his. Her taste was so sweet it left him thirsting for more; like a starved man he took her breath away and gave it back, he held her tightly to him, one hand at the back of her head, the other on the small of her back. Kagome felt her knees buckle, if not for Sesshoumaru, she would have fallen.

Softly, timidly, Kagome started to respond to Sesshoumau's kisses; she passed her tongue against Sesshoumaru's and she felt his intake of breath; it only served to give her more courage, boldly, she pressed herself against him.

He was going mad, if Kagome didn't stop now, he would loose all control, though he knew that when it came to Kagome, his legendary control was easily shattered, all he wanted was to take her here and now. Finally, breathing hard he broke the kiss and quickly swept Kagome into his arms and took off. He did not want to be so near Inuyasha and his dead clay bitch, and to take Kagome away from the pain, those were his only thoughts as they flew across Inuyasha's forest, until Sesshoumaru found a clearing with a lake and settled down, letting Kagome drop lightly to her feet beside him.

Kagome turned to walk towards the lake but Sesshoumaru snaked his arms around her waist and pulled her against him, holding her to him. "I want you" he whispered against her ear sending shivers down her spine.

Kagome gasped, and her face stared heating up. What would it be like to loose herself in the arms of someone that loved you?

But duty brought her back to the present, it was always duty, duty to the Shinkon no Tama, duty to Inuyasha, no matter how he betrayed her, how her pain tore at her heart. Duty was what kept her by Inuyasha's side now, more than anything, her love for him had succumbed to nothing, only her friendship, but now, he betrayed that as well. There was nothing Kagome could to but to stay by his side like she promised, and she had promised, and she will fulfill that and stay by his side till the Shinkon no Tama was complete so he could bring Kikyou back to life or make himself a full youkai.

Sesshoumaru felt her resolve and her inner struggle, he himself was more than happy to kill the hanyou for creating such turmoil in her soul, but he knew that part of it was because of himself, though Sesshoumaru's pride told him it was not true, that there was no way that he could hurt her, he knew that he had already done so without intending to. Had he not appeared, this would not have had happened, but how can he not come to her when he felt such pain in a beautiful soul? He sighed when she pulled away, though he didn't let his hands drop from her shoulders but he felt alone, even with their close proximity, he felt lonely.

Kagome turned in his arms and stared at those golden eyes that are so similar to Inuyasha's, she saw him with all his barriers down, with no more ice incasing his heart, saw the loneliness in them and knew she was the cause. Her eyes soften as she gazed at his perfect profile, "I cannot let you..." she whispered, moving closer and leaning her head against his chest hoping he would understand, "I have promised to Inuyasha that I would be by his side no matter what, and I cannot back out of my promises even though he betrayed me. I cannot leave my duties either, for the Shinkon no Tama was shattered because of me and I have the obligation to complete it once again."

Sesshoumaru tightened his arms around Kagome, "I know, one of the reasons I have fallen in love with you is because of your sense of honor and duty."

Her eyes widened, he was admitting his love to her? She knew that he had feelings for her, but to admit them? Then her shocked expression melted away to be replaced by a brilliant smile, "Thankyou..."

"Would you have left with me had you not made a promise with Inuyasha? Had I promised to protect you and to help you fulfill your duty? Would you be my mate?" he asked.

Kagome thought for a moment, would she? Had she not promised Inuyasha to be by his side forever, would she have followed Sesshoumaru, be his mate? "I would not give up Inuyasha's friendship for anything in the world Sesshoumaru, he was the first friend I had here, my one true friend, but if I had not promised him, and he had agreed, I would have traveled with you no matter what." She paused again for a moment before continuing with such passion in her voice that Sesshoumaru wanted to treasure her the more, "I would have gladly become your mate though, even if Inuyasha did not let me."

"Then let me perform a bonding between us, I will not mate you, but it will surve to let all know that you are my mate, and none will think to take you from me."

Her eyes brimming with tears she smiled, radiantly, a smile that took his breath away, "Yes, I will be your mate, and when my duty to Inuyasha in over, I will stay by your side and be your lady, to bear your child..."

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The sun shone brightly in the sky, it was morning, and the group of shard hunters once again moved on, now with two new members, one which was not known to them and another, hated by most but one hanyou. They moved over the terrains at the border of the Western Lands searching for Naraku and the Shinkon no Kakera.

Unknown to the group a shadow lurked in the edge of the forest, following their path, watching, waiting, not even the two youkai and hanyou in their group could smell the shadow, concealed with a spell it watched with keen eyes at the group below.

They moved on, unheeded but for a raven haired beauty with soft blue eyes, she caught a movement in the trees by her side and smiled at the flash of white, her mind reaching out to her love and merging with him.

"What is it okaa-san?" asked the small kitsune in her arms.

Kagome smiled and shook her head, "Nothing Shippo, nothing, do not worry, someone is protecting us..."

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Author's note: So, did you like it? Please review and tell me what you think!!! Please please please!!!

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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