sesshous_girl- Wed 02 May 2007
wow that was interesting

gouka chibi fujo- Wed 02 May 2007
ok not a flame. the thing is your story is very hard to read. you can't tell what is going on or who is really talking at the time or if they are thinking it

when someone is talking you should do this

'' I'm going to see what is keeping Inuyasha '' Said Kagome to Sango as she got up off the ground from the fire.

you start a new line when someone else talk.

''Ok Kagome be careful'' She said as Kagome walked towards the forest.

i'm telling you this because the way your story is right now people will give you very low ratings. and ratings show people what they want to read.

i'm sorry to say this i read your story because i wanted to why your rating were so low sorry.

just edit what you have to make it clearer and i think you could have a good story that people will love

gouka

I Love Sessomaru AKA FLUFFY- Wed 02 May 2007
Continue soon please and thank you

sesshous_girl- Mon 30 Apr 2007
cool can't wait for more chapters but you should really separate your people and how they're talking

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