Susceptible by Kono Ama

Instinct

Author’s note: Hello my pretties! This story came about because I read a fantastic story by Kogasangel. It is called ‘Instincts of the Inu’ and it is a MUST read. It is a one shot though just as this one will be. In hers (I hope you are a her if not then my apologies!) she gives you a more accepting Kagome of her fate. Here I want to show you the darker side. Not always are we accepting of our Alphas or our superiors. Sometimes we want to stand up and fight back. In this story, you will get to see what happens when Kagome fights back against her Alpha.

Warnings: Character death. I cannot stress this enough, CHARACTER DEATH!!! Implied rape (since I don’t feel comfortable writing it), sexual abuse. If you do not want to read, then please move on because you have been warned.

Summary: When it comes to instincts, some species are more susceptible to lose themselves in it. When Sesshoumaru and his beast decide they want what is theirs by right they will do anything to claim the alpha bitch of the pack. Even if it means going against her will…

Rating: MA (to be on the safe side) meaning no one under 18 should read this. If you do then I am not liable because you have been warned!

~*~

Susceptible

~*~

Ever since the joining of the two packs, there have been fights nonstop between the two youkai brothers. They had joined packs only so that they could defeat Naraku. When it came to the actual battle, it was neither of the brothers that gave the killing blow. It was the lone miko in the group. Kagome felled the vile hanyou that had plagued the world for so many years. And with that it signed her fate.

It was supposed to be easy. Join the pack, fight the big baddie, and then separate the pack. But did that happen? No, it sure as hell didn’t. For three months after the death of Naraku, Sesshoumaru and his pack have lingered. He refused to leave the pack. And in doing so, Inuyasha and him have fought at every turn to see who was going to be the alpha of the two packs now turned one. Don’t get Kagome wrong. She liked the extra company. It was just the fact that Sesshoumaru was giving her the creeps. He kept eyeing her when he thought she wasn’t looking. And the heat that came into those eyes made shivers run down her back. And not the good kind.

Kagome even swears she caught him watching her bathe every time she went to bathe alone. It had gotten so bad that she only took baths with Sango and if Sango decided she didn’t want to take a bath then it looked like Kagome wasn’t taking a bath that night. And she wasn’t the only one who noticed Sesshoumaru’s weird behavior. The whole group did! Even Jaken! Sango was worried about the youkai’s attention on her surrogate sister. She knew the instincts of the inu and she knew why he was looking at her the way he was. Kagome had some how been raised to alpha bitch status and she was the only one besides the other youkais who knew this.

Sango needed to warn her sister before it was too late. And she planned to do it tonight when they went to bathe. She was thrown out of her thoughts by the clashing of metal. Startled, Sango looked up in time to see an epic battle between the two brothers that she knew was going to decide the fate of Kagome. It was too intense not to. Seeing her chance to talk to Kagome slipping away, she became desperate. She searched for Kagome in the clearing and saw her on the other side looking at the two brothers with knowing eyes. What she knew, Sango could only guess. She needed to make her way there, but before she could the battle had already ended and so did her chances of warning Kagome. It was now out of her hands.

“Submit.” Sesshoumaru growled out lowly, but still to where the humans could hear clearly. Inuyasha growled but bared his neck nonetheless. He hated to but he knew he was beat. With that Sesshoumaru disappeared with Kagome in tow. They heard her screeches from where they were and both Sango and Shippo fell in a heap of sobs for they knew that their Kagome wasn’t going to be the same with what was to come.

“What just happened?” The normally wise monk asked clueless.

It was surprisingly Shippo who answered. “The new alpha is claiming his alpha bitch and Kagome may not survive…”

~*~

Sesshoumaru raced through the trees and in his lust induced state he didn’t hear the pleas or screams coming from his intended mate. He was too excited to finally be claiming the one that was his by right. When he got to the desired clearing, he set his intended down ready to start the actual mating. What he got was not the mating, but a screaming female. And not from pleasure.

“What the hell do you think you are doing Sesshoumaru?! Why the flying fuck did you take me from the camp site? And what right do you have to manhandle me?!” Kagome was now red in the face. She had been warned by Inuyasha what the fighting was really about and she had hoped he would come out on the top because she was in love with him not Sesshoumaru and he had promised after Naraku was dead that they would mate. Now it seemed that she was supposed to mate this beast before her. For that was what he was. He had let himself go to the beast inside. Something he always said was beneath him.

Sesshoumaru growled at the defiance that his bitch showed him. She should be honored that he was so willing to mate with a human. If she hadn’t shown him her real power, he wouldn’t have even looked twice at her. And now she thought to deny him? Hell no. Sesshoumaru growled loud at her in inu-tongue. Something that any inu would understand, but to her, it just seemed as if he was trying to intimidate her. But it wasn’t working. She knew that she had the right to challenge him as alpha bitch of the pack. Inuyasha had taught her well.

“You will submit to me. It is within my rights to claim the pack alpha bitch and I am claiming that right.” Sesshoumaru’s normally smooth baritone voice was now gravelly and sinister sounding thanks to his beast.

“And it is within my rights to challenge that. And I am challenging you to mating rights. You win and you have me. I win and you cannot touch me…ever.” Kagome said with confidence she just wasn’t feeling. She had to win so that she could go back to her love. She just had to.

Sesshoumaru growled again because he knew she was right. She was allowed to challenge him. He was just hoping since she was human she wouldn’t know that. Now it seemed he had to show her, her place. A sinister smile made its way across his face. He was going to enjoy this.

He shot off towards her, claws extended. He may not kill her, but he sure was going to rip her a new one. Youkai did love their blood mixed in with their mating. It was why so many humans didn’t survive the matings. They were too violent and died from blood loss. It was lucky for him that his mate was a miko and therefore could heal just as quickly as a hanyou. He didn’t expect a barrier to shoot up from around her as his claws connected. She wasn’t fast enough to escape getting her shoulder gouged, but she did manage to hurt him with her purifying barrier. Kagome was disappointed that he didn’t lose his hand though.

Kagome hid behind her barrier as he pounded on it trying to think of a plan to defeat him. He was stronger than Naraku, but not when he had the jewel shards. She watched with slight fascination as every time his hands made contact with the barrier his hands sizzled. She knew this was going to be hard. Then out of nowhere her barrier collapsed and she felt his fist make contact with her jaw. Kagome felt the crunch of her bones shatter and pain exploded in the side of her face. She could feel her powers rise up to start healing and horror set into her body. No one knew besides her that if her powers were healing her body that she couldn’t raise them in defense.

And by the look on Sesshoumaru’s face, he had just figured it out. If that horribly chilling chuckle he let loose was any indication. Suddenly Kagome had the feeling of wanting to die as he let loose on her body. She receded into her mind and wished this was Inuyasha with her because she knew at least he would be gentle.

~*~

It had been two weeks since the initial rape and every night since then it was repeated. Sometimes he would just have his way with her and sometimes he was gentle. It was those times that he was gentle that made her really want to die. Everyday she was reminded that she was his and no one else’s. Kagome watched her friends try and win her back, but it was too late. He had already laid claim to her. She was his until her death.

Shippo stirred in her arms before taking a sniff of her smell to let him know she was still there. Still his mama. That was one thing that Kagome refused to budge on. Shippo was her son and she would continue to hold him much to Sesshoumaru’s displeasure. But he allowed her this one comfort because he knew that he was rough on her. He couldn’t figure out how to make her respond to him. When he was rough with her, she would look blankly at him and not utter a word. When he was gentle with her, she would cry and look away in despair. Sesshoumaru wanted what she gave Inuyasha so freely. At first he didn’t care, but as soon as he laid his mark on her he felt immense love. Not for him, though now he wished it, but for his brother. And now he craved it. Yet she refused to give it.

Maybe alienating her from her friends and Inuyasha wasn’t such as smart thing to do. He would have to rectify that. Starting now. “Why don’t you go talk to the slayer? We are stopping for the night. A bath would do you some good.” Sesshoumaru said softly for her ears only. He was hoping for her eyes to shine brightly in happiness. He was hoping for that smile that was reserved for her friends to be shone upon him. He was hoping for a lot of things but not what he got.

Dull lifeless eyes stared back at him before Kagome mutely nodded her head. She gave Shippo a gentle squeeze before letting him on the ground to make her way to Sango. Sesshoumaru watched her with longing and desperation as they left the camp site that was being made.

“I hate you.” Came the hoarsely whisper of Shippo. Sesshoumaru looked down at him with surprise, though none should on his face. “You broke her. She isn’t my mama anymore. You killed her and now she is nothing more than Kikyou was. She is slowly dying and I am losing my mama all over again. I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU!!!” With that Shippo jumped onto Sesshoumaru and started to claw at his face.

Sesshoumaru was so surprised at the raw emotion, the pure hatred, which came from a being so small that he didn’t react right away. When he did, it was to just put the now sobbing kit into the arms of the monk, who looked at him with disgust. Was the kit right? Did he really kill her? Not literally of course, but emotionally. He had noticed that she wasn’t as lively and upbeat as she used to be, but he had contributed that as her knowing her place and acting submissive. Was he wrong this whole time?

~*~

As soon as they made it to the hot spring, Sango swept Kagome in a tight embrace and sobbed her apologies. “I am so sorry! Please forgive me! I meant to warn you before it was supposed to happen so that you could escape to your time! Please! Forgive me!” Sango keened in Kagome’s ear as her tears drenched her kimono. She was no longer allowed to wear her uniform because Sesshoumaru didn’t want anyone seeing what was his.

Kagome sighed. “Inuyasha warned me weeks before it happened Sango. There is no reason for you to ask for forgiveness. Please stop crying. I need to ask you of something.” Kagome said with a seriousness that put her on edge.

“Anything.” Though she was hesitant to use that word, Sango knew she owed it to Kagome.

“I need your tantō. I am going to commit jigai.*” She held up her hand to silence the protest from her sister. “I cannot continue this. It hurts too much. I wish to die honorably, but I will not because I know I am taking the life of another with me.”

“Another?” Sango was terrified to ask. She was grieving for she was about to lose another person in her life. She wanted to stop her, but she knew she couldn’t. She said she would do anything for her and she meant it.

“Sesshoumaru doesn’t know this, but I carry his heir. When I die, I want you to tell him about his son that he will never know. I want him to suffer. Tell him to let this be a reminder that he should not go against a person's will and that, that night that he took me, he became something he said was beneath him. He let the beast take over and became mindless. Tell him that Inuyasha would have done a better job. And tell him…that he will always have my hatred.” Kagome said coldly even as she mourned her unborn pup that she wished with all her heart was Inuyasha’s.

Sango bit back a gasp at how cold and unfeeling her sister was being, but nodded to her in understanding.

~*~

The group watched as Sango made her way back into camp and walked over to Shippo. Shippo could see the sadness radiating from her eyes and instantly knew that he was going to be motherless. Instead of crying like he wanted to, he grew angry at the cause of him losing yet again a mother. But he bit his tongue because if he spoke again he would alert the bastard of what his mama was going to do. Shippo may have not liked what Kagome was going to do, but he wasn’t going to deprive her the only thing she could control. She deserved to be let free after everything she had done for them.

Shippo looked up at Sango and nodded as a lone tear trailed down his face. He didn’t even bother wiping it away. Soon more would be joining them. Inuyasha looked away, already knowing what was about to happen. When he brought her home to see her mother, she told him everything. He was going to hate having to tell her mother that he failed in protecting her. Even from herself. Miroku tightened his hands on his staff when he realized what was about to happen. Everything in him was yelling for him to go after her and stop her. But he knew that even if he left now, he wouldn’t make it. And he would rather not see her dead body lying amongst her spilt blood.

“Where is my mate, slayer?” Sesshoumaru growled out. He knew something was up when she came back by herself and from the way the others were acting. There was a sadness that lingered in the air around them. He didn’t like it at all. Just as he was waiting for her answer, a great pain engulfed him. Sesshoumaru roared his anguish out to the sky as he fell to his knees. Only one thing could explain this pain. His mate was dead.

He made to go after her, knowing his sword would revive her, but his path was blocked by a powerful barrier. A barrier that was not the making of the miko. Snarling, he turned to see the monk with ofudas prepared to throw at him. “What is the meaning of this?! My mate is dead! Let me go to her now!”

“We know bastard. She committed jigai. She wanted me to tell you something. She said to tell you to let this be a reminder that you should not go against someone else’s will. That the night you took her, raped her, you became something you deemed beneath you. You became a mindless beast and that Inuyasha would have done a better job and not lost to his beast. Also…she said that when she dies…you will always have her hatred.” Sango said with a coldness that matched her heart at that moment.

Sesshoumaru snarled in rage and lunged at her. Before anyone could move, a barrier surrounded Kagome’s friends. “Even now she is protecting us. Even now we still have her love. Tell me Sesshoumaru. How does it feel to have never known the love of an angel? How does it feel to know you will never know the heir that she carries in her womb?” Sango taunted even though her heart was heavy at the loss of her friend and the reminder that surrounded them.

Shippo was sobbing his sorrow in, to his surprise, Inuyasha’s chest as he rubbed the little kits back. They felt the loss the hardest, but they knew they always had each other and now Shippo was Inuyasha’s son as he was Kagome’s. This was the way it was meant to be in the beginning.

~*~

(I am back tracking a little to before she killed herself. Just so there is no confusion.)

Kagome sat in front of the hot spring as she said her last goodbyes in prayer. She took a long black cloth and proceeded to tie her knees together tightly. Kagome looked at the shiny blade that was about to take her life and finally felt peace. Placing a hand on her stomach, she whispered to her baby her apologies. “I am sorry that I will never get to know you the way a mother should. I do not in good conscience feel right to let you into this world knowing that there is nothing but hatred coming your way. Please forgive me and I hope we will meet one day under better circumstances.”

Kagome took the blade and flipped her hair back so that it wouldn’t get in the way. Raising it to her neck, she slit her throat fast and deep. Kagome winced at the pain before letting a smile cross her face. “Inuyasha…forgive me…for not…keeping my…promise…” She said with her last breath. He body slumped forward but did not touch the ground. Her body was poised even in death.

~*~

Sesshoumaru made his way to the spring as fast as he could. The barrier finally broke and he was free to save her though he knew it was to late. He paused at the clearing, not ready to see the lifeless body of his mate. He had grown to love her in the few weeks he had her. And now she was gone and so was his son…

He walked past the tree line and saw her there in a kneeling position and almost dared to hope that she was still alive. But he knew she wasn’t because the scent of death clung to her and the surrounding. And so did the scent of pregnancy. He was a fool for not realizing it sooner. Sesshoumaru knelt beside her body and saw the smile that graced her face. Even in death she didn’t smile for him. He now knew how bad he had messed up.

Brushing back a strand of hair, he gazed upon her face. “Even in death you are beautiful. I may have your hatred in death, but know this my precious hime; you have my love in death as well.” With that he pierced his own heart with a deadly claw. He slumped forward into her lap and rolled slightly to the side so that his face was looking up at her. Sesshoumaru took his hand out of his chest and raised it to her face, only to have his strength leave him and his eyes close with his last breath.

~*~

And that was how they found them. Together even in death. And for the first time the Inuyasha group saw a true smile gracing the cold youkai’s face. They looked morbidly beautiful with his head in her lap, smiling up at her, and she looking down on him like a lover would. It was a sad sight to see and it broke the group’s hearts even more as they cried silent tears.

~*~

The End

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*Jigai is often done to preserve one's honor if a military defeat was imminent, so as to prevent rape. Invading armies would often enter homes to find the lady of the house seated alone, facing away from the door. On approaching her, they would find that she had ended her life long before they reached her.

*Tantō is a dagger used in jigai.

Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jigai

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tant%C5%8D

I hope you guys enjoyed my story even though it is sad. Please leave a review!