Weird, Weirder, Weirdest by tenchi no mai

"I Can't Watch This"

This was written in response to Hairann’s Weirdified Challenge.   

Theme:  “I Can’t Watch This”

Required Word Count:  500 +             

Actual Word Count:  686, Story Only

Universe:  Canon Universe

Rating:  M for innuendoes

Warnings:  None 

Disclaimer: The characters of InuYasha are not mine, they are the property of Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz Media.   Only the plot to this story, and my original characters, Shun and Makoto, are my intellectual property.  I do not make any money from the writing of this story.  I do not own, nor do I have any financial interest, in any of the following:  ‘Weird’ Al Yankovic, “I Can’t Watch This”; MC Hammer, “U Can’t Touch This”; The Food Network; Discovery Channel; Home and Garden Network; The History Channel.  

This little tale is dedicated to my friend Akay from Chat, who gave me the inspiration to get this story out of my head and onto the page.

I Can’t Watch This

Kagome, flipping through the television channels with the remote, was ready to scream.  Two hundred eighty nine cable channels and she couldn’t find anything to watch.  Everything was either reruns or sports commentaries about ‘it’ were on.  There wasn’t even anything interesting on The Food Network, Discovery Channel, Home and Garden Network or the History Channel.  

It seemed like ‘it’ was always in the news lately; on the television, the radio, in the papers, and ‘it’ was all the pack was talking about, and had been talking about for weeks.  ‘It’ was driving her absolutely crazy!  Even Sesshoumaru and Shun had gotten caught up in ‘it’ this year.  It seemed like every other word out of anyone’s mouth had to do with ‘it’.  She was sick and tired of hearing about ‘it’.  

Thank the Kami ‘it’ was almost over.  There couldn’t be too many games left; ‘it’ must have been going on for at least a month now.  The synchronized frenzy was getting on her last nerve.  How they could sit and watch ‘it’ was beyond her comprehension.  All the running back and forth and jumping, it just didn’t make a lot of sense to her; of course neither did their obsession with the pigskin during the winter months.  It seemed like one season of sports mania followed closely on the heels of another with no discernable time lapse between them, and Inuyasha tried to involve the entire pack in every one.  The only one she truly understood and could enjoy was ice hockey.  Souta had played while in high school and she used to take him to early morning practice at the local rink before school. 

As she walked through the shiro, searching for Sesshoumaru or Shun, she thought it was extremely odd that it was deathly quiet and appeared to be deserted.  Passing the security office, she peeked inside; it was empty, even Makoto was missing in action. 

Heading towards the kitchen to start dinner, she knew that as soon as the smell of searing meat reached sensitive demon noses, they would reappear as if by magic, salivating like Pavlov’s dogs.  Not sure how many of the pack were currently on the premises, Kagome decided to cook extra.  If it didn’t all get eaten at dinner there was always someone searching the refrigerator for a late night snack or it could be turned into tomorrow’s lunch. 

Thunk – thunk – thunk.  Hearing noise from outside, Kagome found herself at the door that led from the breakfast room out onto the large patio and the gardens beyond.  It had been left open by whomever was the last person through.  Her eyes widened as her mouth dropped open.  The only one who could have instigated this was Inuyasha. 

It appeared that the entire pack was here at the shiro, including some of Kouga’s wolves.  Thunk – thunk – thunk.  The guys had gotten hold of two portable basketball systems and set up a full size court on the patio.  Kagome was mesmerized as she watched them running up and down the court, slam dunking the ball.  The shorter demons, hanyou, and humans were at a distinct disadvantage, as the taller, stronger demons in the group easily maneuvered to keep the ball away from them.  

It was a warm day for March, and the gang had stripped off their shirts.  Sweat was glistening on hard, muscled bodies as they exerted themselves.  Long hair, caught up in either in pony tails or braids, swayed and swung as they twirled, twisted and jumped, appearing to almost float across the court.   Thunk – thunk – thunk.  Kagome appreciatively eyed her mates as Sesshoumaru and Shun passed the ball between themselves, Bankotsu and Kouga, with Miroku huffing and puffing to keep up.  

Her heartbeat and breathing suddenly picked up speed and quickly passed the fast cadence of the bouncing basketball.   Kagome blushed as she noticed noses start twitching.  Knowing smirks were cast in her direction, along with some snickers and leers.  Quietly closing the door, and leaning back against it, she smiled and thought that maybe, just maybe, March Madness was not so bad after all.  Thunk – thunk – thunk.

~*~

Fin

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