Weeping Willows by Dragoness

Weeping Willows

Weeping Willows by Dragoness

 

DISCLAIMER: The characters of InuYasha are not mine; they are property of Rumiko Takahashi. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: This is my first fanfiction so be kind.  I will accept any and all constructive criticism no flames please.

 

Chapter 1

How Did We Come to This?

She stood there frozen in shock, a flood of grief storming through her heart, blue eyes that once held so much light and warmth now dull and full of pain.

 “Breathe, Breathe!!!” her mind kept telling her but her body still refused.   Suddenly the blue sky above her was not the soft nurturing sky of spring, but the cold, chilling, lonely sky of winter. Finally, after what seemed a lifetime she exhaled but what came out was nothing more than a strangled cry.  In the distance coming from the direction Kagome had been staring at for the last five minutes a ferocious howl could be heard.

Not only anger resonating in the howl but also wretchedness, desolation so bleak that it was beyond despair. That broke the spell. Shaking, her hands balled into tight fists at her side Kagome collapsed to the ground, her strength robbed by grief as her tears flowed freely.  Her body was  covered by a fine sheen of sweat, it felt as if every pore of her body were weeping along with her. 

  Her head hanging low Kagome dug her nails in the earth trying to steady the overflow of emotions until all sound stopped and everything started going black. Her last thoughts were on just what had gone wrong, but of course she knew what had happened.

It had all started with just three little words. Even though Kagome had learned years ago that those words were just another lie spoken to ensure cooperation from the other sex, she ignored her head and her hearts’ warnings.  Three little words…I love you. Had they been said by anyone else she would have just scoffed.  But coming from him it sounded like the angels themselves had said it, his beautiful golden eyes staring into the depths of her soul as he leaned down only inches from her face his deep sexy voice sending tremors along her spine. Surely he was too old to play games. Living as long as he had and being as honorable as he was it was sincere, right? Of course by now he knew what he wanted and meant every word that followed. Lost in those eyes, surrounded by his enticing scent she had believed him.   That was her first and biggest mistake of all.  She had trusted him with her heart.

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For the past six years Kagome had been pretty carefree when it came to relationships.  The layers she put up had grown very thick over the years.  She had learned that lesson the hard way in her first and only real relationship.  Inuyahsa, even now she could still feel the loss of him.

 Over the years the time had healed most of her wounds but some of the insecurities still remained. She wasn’t in love with him anymore but she still loved him and a part of her heart would always belong to him. He had been her first everything and she always dreamed they would grow old together.

  He was immature but she just knew she could change that, he just needed time and encouragement.  However, with time things just got worse.  His mistreatment of her and total disregard for her feelings left her with quite a lot of baggage. She was so young when they met.

Looking back now Kagome could see just how naïve and foolish she was, making excuse after excuse for his behavior. She should have left sooner but she couldn’t.  When we are miserable we sometimes cling to the one thing that makes us miserable.  Even though she wanted to change the misery was something she knew.  However, the last time she walked in on him cheating with another woman that was it.

She had a moment of clarity and in the blink of eye she finally understood what everyone had been telling her for so long.  He would never be able to give her what she deserved; his whole heart and soul. She believed Inuyasha did love her in his own way but he would never love her the way she needed.

She was a good person and damn it she deserved to be happy too, it just took her a long time to realize it. They were just not meant to be no matter how hard they tried.  That's when she walked away. From him, from everything. 

Kagome took all her longings and feelings about love and shoved them deep inside so they would never see the light of day, telling herself that it was all just a fools dream.  Love is just a fairytale that adults told children to make the world seem less harsh and cruel.  It was at that point Kagome shut everyone other than her mom, Souta, and gramps out.  Never again would she be in a relationship, men were something to be played with no more.  Kagome lived like this for years refusing to let anyone get close.  Then he came along and everything went down the drain.

 

INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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