Does He Have Emotion? by Kai

Emotion

A/N: Bwa-Bwa-Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I really shouldn’t have written this fic. But damn did I love doing it. I never knew that tormenting Sesshomaru would be this fun! And for those who loved my story ‘Crack’ should love this one too. So please, enjoy!

Challenge: 50 Ways to Torture a Taiyoukai

Word count: 1000 to 5000

Actual word count: 2,659

No one knows how the conversation started. In fact, no one knew how it began and where it went. But the next thing that everyone knew, they were talking about it.

“I don’t think so.” Inuyasha said as he leaned in his tree while they were having dinner. Kagome had run out of ramen so it was bore for the night. “I mean, I’ve never even seen the bastard smile except when he was about to kill someone. Or punt Jaken across a field.”

“No, he’s got to have emotions.” Kagome mused. “Everyone does. If he didn’t he wouldn’t be taking care of Rin the way he does. I think he just hides them well.”

Sango shook her head. “I’ve hunted many youkai in the past Kagome. If Sesshomaru does have emotions, he locks them away.”

“How funny would it be if someone brought them out?” Miroku chuckled. “Maybe seem him actually laugh or get angry and curse. We could always liquor him up. Everyone loses their composure with the power of booze.” There was a loud crack as Sango smacked the monk for his wondering hand.

Shippo chuckled. “Now my dear monk, I don’t think booze will work. Sesshomaru is a powerful youkai. And trust me, he wouldn’t be subdued by something like that. A good trick would do it. Someone would have to surprise him.”

Inuyasha burst out laughing. “I highly doubt it. He’s an iceberg. I don’t think he’s even ticklish.”

“Wanna bet?!” Shippo demanded as he got up.

Kagome arched an eyebrow at the thought. “How about we do that very thing.” She said as she sipped her tea. Already she was thinking of a plot that would even make Naraku proud. “How about we all make a bet on if we can get Sesshomaru to crack and show emotion other than the ones he shows.”

“And tell me dear Kagome,” Miroku asked, “What does the victor get if they can cause our cold daiyoukai to show emotion?”

Kagome tilted her head for a moment as she thought about it. “Whatever they want for a day.” Kagome said simply.

“Keh. There’s nothing I want except the rest of the jewel.” Said the hanyou. “So that’s not a fair bet.”

The teenage girl smirked. “Oh really Inuyasha? You mean to say that you wouldn’t like to be S-A-T-ed for a whole day? A whole day without me saying sit. How wonderful would that be?”

Inuyasha crashed to the ground, glaring at her. But she did have a good point. To go through a whole day without that would be heaven. His back could rest for once!

Kagome looked over at Miroku and Sango. “What about you two? Miroku, about to do what you want without Sango hitting you? Sango, to have a day where Miroku isn’t molesting or asking any woman to sleep with him? Shippo? You could have a whole day that Inuyasha doesn’t hit you while you tease him.”

The others began to agree happily with this. Already the idea seemed better and better with each word that Kagome said to them. Kagome on the other hand sipped at her tea happily. Honestly, she couldn’t figure out why Naraku always failed at getting people to do what he wanted. Kagome was doing a good job herself and this was the first time she had tried.

“What would you want if you win?” Inuyasha demanded as he pulled himself up and crossed his arms.

Kagome arched an eyebrow. “Isn’t it simple Inuyasha? A day at a hot spring resort back at home where you can’t follow me and bother me.” She sighed happily at the thought. Her friends came up with some tickets to a resort and she was dying to go.

“So are we all in an agreement?” Kagome asked.

“Name your terms.” Sango said, ideas already forming in her mind.

Kagome finished her tea. “Someone always has to be there. And sense we all could team up on each other, I say it should be Kirara. Sense Kirara is always neutral in these kinds of things. She won’t take sides. The time limit is one week. Sense Naraku is in hiding again, we shouldn’t take it any longer than that.”

Everyone nodded their heads in agreement.

Slowly a smirk made its way on Kagome’s face. “Let the games begin.”

**

Round one: Inuyasha

Inuyasha stood in the middle of the field facing his ice berg of a brother, a smirk on his face. This would be too easy. He would get his victory and he wouldn’t’ be sat for a whole day!

“What do you want brother?” Sesshomaru asked in a bored tone. He really had some business that he needed to be taken care of. Playing with the half-breed wasn’t part of it.

Inuyasha continued to smirk. If there was one thing he was good at, it was pissing people off. Sesshomaru being angry counted as an emotion. “You’re a bastard Sesshomaru!” Inuyasha yelled, pointing a clawed finger at him.

The daiyoukai arched an eyebrow. “If you are just going to call me names whelp, then I’m leaving.”

“I’m calling you a bastard! Your father is dead and there was nothing you can do about it!” Inuyasha snapped. If there anything that would irritate Sesshomaru, it would be insulting his father.

Sesshomaru didn’t even blink. “Whelp, father died saving your life. So if you’re to point a finger, point it at yourself. Not at this Sesshomaru. Now, are we done here?”

Inuyasha Blinked as he looked for another insult. “You’re a pretty boy who dances while he fights! I bet you take it up the ass!”

Not even a twitch. “Inuyasha, I’m not playing your games.” He said simply. No anger, no irritation. Just… bored.

Inuyasha gaped at him. “You mean it’s true?! I have a gay brother?!”

The daiyoukai just stared at him for a moment before turning and walking away. “I’m surprised at your stupidity. I blame your human mother. She must have dropped you on your head too many times as a pup.” With that he left.

Round one winner? Sesshomaru

**

Round two: Sango

The slayer walked into Sesshomaru camp, sighing slightly as she did. She looked a bit distressed, if not depressed. “Oh Sesshomaru,” She said with a sigh. “I’m sorry if I came here uninvited. I kind of stormed off from the camp and wondered here by mistake.”

“State your business then leave slayer.” He said as he tended the fire for Rin. The girl went off to take a bath. He wanted to make sure that the fire was still hot so she could warm up after her freezing bath.

Sango sniffled as she sat down. Tears. No man could resist a girl in need. She had seen Kagome do it to Kouga when she was upset at Inuyasha for something. The wolf practically tripped over himself to get the girl to stop crying. “I-I’m sorry.” She whimpered as her fire cat snuggled against her side. “I can’t help it. I’m just under so much stress right now.”

“Your problems are not mine. Take it to someone else.” Sesshomaru said coldly as he prodded the fire again.

Sango looked up at him with watery brown eyes. “That’s the problem, I can’t!” She cried, large tears running down her cheek. “I don’t have anyone to talk to!”

The daiyoukai ignored her while she loudly sobbed to him.

“Sesshomaru-sama?” Rin asked as she came back to camp. “Why is Kagome’s sister crying?”

“I’m not quite sure Rin. I do believe the miko’s friend is trying for the theater.” He said simply.

Sango gawked at him before she took off running, her face completely red.

Round two winner? Sesshomaru

**

Round three: Miroku

“Come Sesshomaru-sama,” the monk said happily as he brought the youkai into a large town with one of the best brothels that he knew. A man always showed emotion either when they were drunk, or though pleasure. There was no way that he would lose with this!

Sesshomaru arched a silver eyebrow as women called to them, waving and beckoning the two men. He could even see some youkai women up there as well. He couldn’t remember why he was here with the monk. All he could remember was that he had told him that they needed to go and talk. Talk somewhere where Rin couldn’t follow. So he placed Jaken in charge and followed after. Why? Even Sesshomaru was questioning himself that one.

“Why are we here monk?” Sesshomaru asked as they entered one of the brothels.

“To enjoy ourselves!” Miroku said merrily. “Come now Sesshomaru-sama, when was the last time you actually sat down and had a drink with some pretty women who all they want to do, is to make you feel better?”

Sesshomaru watched the monk sit down as one of the women poured him a drink. Inwardly sighing, he sat down as well. He was there after all.

Twenty drinks later…

“Oh kami…” Miroku giggled. “Wow Sesshomamo-sama… you are just… wow…”

Sesshomaru arched an eyebrow at the monk. Already he was plastered. Sesshomaru on the other hand? Completely sober. He was starting to think visiting the miko soon about her group of friends was in order. She needed to find new companions.

“I believe I’ve had enough as well as you.” Sesshomaru said as he stood, ignoring the women around him. “I hope you find your way back home monk.” With that he left.

Round three winner? Sesshomaru

**

Round Four: Shippo

He waited in the shadows, his green eyes watching for the perfect moment. Right there. It was time!

Sesshomaru froze as he felt a presence there. The sky darkened, and a large white wolf head lunged at him, trying to take him by surprise. Arching his silver brow, he lashed out, grabbing it by its muzzle. “Kitsune, you will bring me to the miko. I have much to speak to her.”

There was a poof and Shippo appeared pouting. There went his ‘surprise Sesshomaru’ attack. “She’s at the village.” He muttered.

Winner: Sesshomaru

**

“You know Sesshomaru, this tea is fantastic.” Kagome said as she sat in a field. “Come sit and have some tea and snacks.”

The daiyoukai glared at her for a moment. “Miko, I’ve come to talk to you about your companions.”

“I’m not going to listen to you just because you just said I should.” Kagome said as she sipped her tea again. “Yes, good tea. Now how about you sit down and have some snacks. I made these sandwiches I think you’ll love.”

He glanced at the food she offered before sitting down and taking one into his hand. Sniffing it slightly, he deemed it not poisoned and took a large bite.

Something was… off. It was stuck. The bread and this… gooey stuff was stuck at the roof of his mouth! Instantly he began to try to scrape it off with his tongue only to find out that it wasn’t coming off! He growled as he tilted his head to the side as if that would help as he continued to try to get the gooey stuff of the roof of his mouth.

“Explain yourself miko!” he snapped. Though with the stuff in his mouth, it sounded a bit muffled and with a slight lisp. “What have you done to this Sesshomaru’s mouth!”

“And that’s anger.” Kagome muttered before she offered him a cup of red tea. “Try this Sesshomaru. It should wash the peanut butter from the top of your mouth.

Without sniffing it or anything, he grabbed the liquid and quickly downed it. Instantly his eyes became large in shock as he began to pant. His mouth was on fire! He didn’t know what that woman did, but his whole mouth was on fire! Sure the gooey stuff was off his mouth, but now he felt like he just drank fire! So he did the first thing that came to mind when there was a fire. He stuffed dirt into his mouth.

Kagome chuckled and held back a laugh. Oh this was too funny! Anger, desperation, and now she had the perfect plan for the last one. Giddy happiness. Or at least she hoped that this dried up mushroom worked. Her grandfather said it was a perfect herb that would make anyone giddy. She wasn’t sure about the last one, but she knew her friends were watching in shock. She just needed to put the icing on the cake and seal the deal.

“Here, drink this.” Kagome said as she gave him water. “Dirt cannot be good for you.”

Sesshomaru glared at her as he took the water. “What are you trying to do to me Miko?” He demanded before sniffing the water. His mouth was still a bit hot, but it now tasted like dirt.

Kagome shrugged. “I’m just trying to make nice with you Sesshomaru by sharing my culture with yours. As a peace offering, let me share with you something that my grandfather gave me.”

Sesshomaru finished off the water, glad that there wasn’t anything in it. His mouth no longer tasted of dirt or fire. He looked at the dried mushroom and looked at her. “Miko, this is a dried mushroom.” He pointed out.

Kagome shrugged. “Fine then. Refuse a gift from someone. God you people are so rude here. Even Inuyasha wouldn’t eat it saying it was stupid. Figures you brothers would be the same when it comes to being rude.”

His eyes narrowed as he snagged it from her and quickly ate it. He refused to be compared to that half breed of a brother.

Kagome watched as Sesshomaru ate it quickly. Some how she felt that maybe she should have told him to eat it slowly, not swallow the whole thing. Then again, her grandfather’s weird herbs were… well just weird. Of course she stared to get a bit worried when Sesshomaru became very still and quite.

“Um… Sesshomaru?” Kagome asked as she looked at him. Her eyes widened as she saw that his eyes were completely dilated. “Oh god… Sesshomaru? Are you alright?”

He slowly put his finger to his lips. “Shhh.” He whispered. “I’m a tree. If I move, they’ll find me!”

Kagome gaped at him. Her grandfather…  gave her shrooms! Oh god she was a dead miko when Sesshomaru snapped out of it.

Sesshomaru looked over at Kagome, his eyes wide before a large grin reached his lips. “Miiiiko!” He said gleefully as he lunged at her.

Kagome quickly got out of the way, not wanting to know what the hell he’ll do to her when he caught her.

Sesshomaru looked down at his hands, pouting when he saw that she wasn’t there. “Where did miko go?” He said, looking around. “Oh miko! Where oh where are you gone?” With that he scampered off trying to find Kagome.

“I really hope that when he snaps out of it, he doesn’t remember this.” Kagome whispered as she headed to the well. After all, she had a hot spring resort to go to. And there was no way in hell she was going to be coming back for a long time.

Five days later…

Kagome threw her bag over the lip of the well, a groan coming from her lips as she climbed. “I really need to get a ladder in here.” She muttered. Seeing a clawed hand in the well, she smiled as she took Inuyasha’s hand and was pulled up the rest of the way.

“Thanks Inuyasha, I think that resort took out most of my energy.” Kagome sighed.

“Good miko, because that means you can’t run away from me.”

Kagome’s eyes went wide as she looked up to see Sesshomaru standing there, anger written all over his face. “Well… at least I can pull out some kind of emotion from you.” She muttered before she took off running.

End