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Grandkids on Demand by kashi

No More Chick Flicks

Crack is wack... but oh so addictive. -Don't do drugs and will never do so but I have taken to this saying that I made up.-

I have to say that this will be the most crackiest crack that my twisted mind has ever come up with. Well actually this is a friend of mine's idea and I decided to write a story for it because it is the most craziest thing I've ever heard. I'll let you guys know that I doubt that the chapters and the story in total will be long but just enjoy it while it last cause I doubt that I will ever write anything more insane then this.

This is for pure fun and because for some reason, I've gotten into writing crack fics for the moment.


Ch. 1 No More Chick Flicks

It was another late night and the raven-haired girl sat on the couch that she had always occupied with a bowl of popcorn watching a chick flick. She didn't want to and in truth, she hates them but nothing else was on...or so that what she tells herself.

"Tell her, tell her your feelings." She whispered as she was in mid chew.

"Kimiko, I... I..." The lead actor stammered.

The woman he was holding looked up at him with large eyes and said, "Yes Rinji."

"Yes Rinji..." Kagome repeated hoping that he would tell her the truth as it been obvious that he liked her from the very beginning except for the clueless Kimiko.

The man looked away as if he was looking for an alternative route to take and Kagome had a feeling that he was going to run. Kagome then yelled while throwing popcorn at the TV, "Don't be a fucking coward!"

"I... I-I got to go." Rinji said as he let go of the woman and turned away.

He only took two steps before he stopped. Two slender arms were around his waist and a head was pressed to his back. He still didn't move but he didn't say anything either. He just felt the woman's body heat and heartbeat.

"You can tell me anything Ri, don't forget that." Kimiko said as her arms tightened around him.

Kagome was literally hanging off the edge of her seat, mouth agape and eyes wide. This was Rinji's chance. It was now or never. One hand lifted to touch hers but other than that, they stayed in their positions.

"Kim, I-"

The TV switched off and Kagome completely fell off the edge. She quickly got up and searched for the remote knowing that she might have just enough time to turn the TV back on. It would take too long for her to get up and turn it on it was the reason why she always kept the remote in her pocket. Unfortunately, it wasn't in her pocket or anywhere on the couch for that matter. She kept searching, needing to know if Riuku confessed or left only to stop when she heard her name.

"Kagome!" Said girl stopped her frantic search to see her friend who had her arms crossed and the remote tapping away on her shoulder. "About damn time, I've been calling your name for a minute-"

The woman holding the remote control couldn't finish her sentence on account of being tackled to the ground. "SANGO! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?"

"I didn't do anything, I just turned the TV off."

"So you admit to your crime, I sentence you to life-no death, OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"

Sango rolled her eyes, it seems as though her roommate and best friend is going through another one of her episodes. She swears that those chick flicks has totally rotted her brain, especially this flick that she know that Kagome has seen enough to memorize all the lines for.

Sango rolled her eyes and said, "If you get off me, I'll let you pick out of my leftovers."

Kagome's eyes lit up as she quickly got off her friend while squealing, "Yay food!"

With the sappy love move as the last thing in her mind, she zipped off to the kitchen where Sango left her doggie bag from the restaurant she went to. Sango stood looking at her bipolar friend and shook her head in amusement.

"So how was your date?" Kagome asked as she swallowed some sea food that she was eating.

Sango sat down and took off her high-heels that had her feet aching all night. "It was fine up until Miroku got out of hand with his hand."

Kagome narrowed her eyes at her as a sly grin spread on his face. "And you liked it."

Sango sighed, there was no use hiding the truth from her friend. "Yea, a little too much. You know how much of a pervert he is, what if he's only going out with me just for sex. I don't want that type of relationship. Not especially how... you know who did what to you.

Kagome put down the food that she was about to put in her mouth and placed her hands over Sango's. She knew what Sango meant. Sango was afraid that her relationship will turn out just as hers and Naraku's did. The ass acted just like Miroku when they first met, nice, trusting, with a perverted sense of humor but he was impatient and let's just say that since then, both Kagome and Sango have been staying away from men. That was until Miroku came into the picture.

Sango completely hated him but he was persistent and wore her nerves down so much that she made a deal that if she went on one date with him, he'll leave her alone. She went, and he left her alone for one week before groveling on his hands and knees to go out with him again. He eventually won her heart as time went on.

"Sango, you know Roku would never hurt you. My cousin is absolutely in love with you and won't shut-up about it." That picked up Sango's confidence in her relationship and she squeezed Kagome's hand. "Besides, it was my fault thinking that I could change that bastard when everyone warned me that he was born a sleaze."

Sango's eyes softened feeling her friend's heart break. She really did fall hard for him but there was nothing that could be done about it except for her to move on.

"Kagome, you should have gone with us."

Kagome looked up and shook her head. "No I couldn't, I don't want to be a fifth wheel. Dates are meant for two people."

"We could have set you up with someone. Roku had a friend that..."

"Sango, I'm fine. Now I'm going to bed." Kagome said as she stood up and put away the dish she had then walked off.

Sure that's what Kagome said but Sango knew otherwise. She sure as hell wouldn't be watching some love movie for like the twentieth time if she was okay (Sango was going to be sure to rid the apartment of all chick flicks). How could she go about life while her best friend didn't have one? If anyone deserved to be happy it was Kagome and Sango sworn that she would find some way to do so.

Sango changed out of her clothes for some pajamas and jumped on her laptop to check her e-mails before going to sleep. She was expecting a message from her brother who just started college over seas and missed him dearly. She read and replied to him before checking all the others but one out of all caught her attention.

"Grandkidsondemand. com? What the..."

Normally strange messages such as this would go to her spam folder for her to delete but she couldn't push away the nagging feeling of curiosity.

Tired of dealing with stubborn sons and daughters who don't want to find that special someone in life? Are you a parent who's sick of waiting for the pitter patter of little feet? Well Grandkids on Demand is the place to go.

We will guarantee that that we will find the perfect match for that loved one.

Sango decided to trash it. It sounded like some silly matchmaking website. She knew that crap would never work. Her finger hovered over the trash button but she hesitated then decided to look at the site.


A beautiful mansion stood on top of a hill and a beautiful demoness came running out of it in tears.

"No, don't run! He didn't mean it! PLEASE!" A demon with long silver hair in a ponytail said while rushing after the crying female.

The female jumped in the back of her car, told her driver to leave, and was gone before the male demon could touch the door. The demon just stood there, mouth agape as the car sped off carrying away his hopes and dreams. His fist balled up and his shoulders tensed while he tried to hold back a growl.

"You should know better than to leave the door open father, the pest will swarm the inside." A cold, emotionless voice said from the doorway.

The demon snapped his head to the figure that was like him in so many ways with the exception of emotion and his amber eyes flashed red. He slowly stalked the figure anger and frustration rolling off him.

"You!" He growled and as soon as he came in front of his son, he grabbed him by the collar and shook him.

"Why did you have to make her cry! She was the one Sesshomaru! She. Was. The. ONE!" He whined. Yes whined, Sesshomaru was the only one that could make the great dog demon, Toga break down.

Sesshomaru sighed and removed his father's hands from him, and scowled when his shirt was wrinkled now. Being the perfectionist he was he took off his shirt intent on putting on another. He turned to see a passing by maid and called her out.

"Naomi, take care of this for me." He said as he held the shirt out for the woman.

Naomi's eyes nearly popped out her head seeing the perfect piece of skin. Broad shoulders, lithe torso, six pack abs, and strong arms. The poor woman fainted which caused Sesshomaru to growl. He called out another servant, male this time who was also the head servant.

"Jaken, take care of this shirt and when that wench comes to, fire her. Sleeping on the job is disrespectful."

Jaken nodded and took his master's article of clothing and walked off to do his duty.

Toga shook his head at the spectacle. This was the problem he's been dealing with for years now. His son is a handsome, no, beautiful male. He was also way stronger, more intelligent, and classier then him. He was also less sociable, stoic, and sadistic as well and because of that, him finding a suitable mate is out of the question. He blames his former mate for brainwashing Sesshomaru when he was younger. He then got the small toad's attention before he disappeared.

"Go on and wash my son's shirt but do not, under any circumstances, fire that young woman. It's not her fault that Sesshomaru is too good looking for his own good."

Jaken nodded understanding his master's orders. This happened nearly everyday. Jaken left and Toga tiredly went upstairs to relax in his study. Sitting down behind the solid oak desk, he pulled out some brandy from the mini fridge beside his desk and poured himself a glass. What was he to do with his grouchy son, he wanted him happy but above all, he wanted pups! He wasn't getting any younger, although he wasn't really aging due to his demon blood. The thing was that Sesshomaru was nearing his 800th birthday and he hasn't shown any interest of wanting a companion.

Toga had his mate when he had been 328, and although they had been arranged and didn't get along, he still felt the need to have a mate. They were compatible but didn't really love one another and it was only after they had Sesshomaru did the shit hit the fan. They had different views on how to raise him and as much as Toga tried to raise Sesshomaru his way, his mother practically won the battle of how his mind works. He received all the strength of his father but the stubbornness of his mother.

The old demon sighed, that was the last demoness that answered the call to being his son's mate. Sesshomaru's ruthless reputation had spread all throughout the demon community and he feared that he'll never get those grand-pups, well, Inuyasha would be an exception since he has a girlfriend now. He just wished that his eldest son would get serious and settle down since he is the one to inherit everything. If something were to happen to him then that was it, everything that he worked so hard to build up will fall down in shambles and there was no way of convincing his youngest of taking over if his eldest screws up. Inuyasha have no interest in working in an office at all, the rebellious punk.

Taking another sip of alcohol, Toga switched on his computer hoping to take his mind off his infuriating son by doing his favorite past time.

"I hope I'm lucky today. There has to be one woman that can be a perfect match for him." He said to himself as he typed into his favorite website.

Grandkids on Demand

It was a website that he created in hopes of finding that one female that will make Sesshomaru see that love isn't a weak emotion. He didn't expect it to get as popular as it did as well as find actually matches for people but he did know that he will find what he was looking for by using this method.

Toga searched the eligible females, most sounded like they were the typical female. They were into the romantic long walks on the beach, dinner by candle light, and picnics in the park. He knew for sure that Sesshomaru would have them running away crying like always. He needed a different girl, one that won't take smack but will give it. One that will stand up and fight when provoked but was also loving, loyal, and intelligent.

He was ready to give up, most of the profiles on the site were a few days old anyway. After an hour of looking a new profile caught his eye.

Name: Kagome Higurashi

Age: 25

Gender: Female

Description: A Loving, loyal, and intelligent woman who stands for herself and fights back when provoked. In need of a man (any man) who could challenge and tame her while at the same time is affectionate and understanding.

Likes: Chick flicks...

It was incredibly eerie and for the most part, he didn't believe the profile at all being that it was exactly what he was looking for. Looking at the picture provided, he couldn't stop the tugging up of his lips. It was a picture of her pushing away the camera while holding back a fist. She seemed like a fiery one and she wasn't that bad of a looker either.

"I'm sure that Sesshomaru could be affectionate and understanding... or at least he'll learn to be." He said to himself as he sent a response.

He knew that Friday coming will be an entertaining one.


INUYASHA © Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan • Yomiuri TV • Sunrise 2000
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