The willing by angel

Lonley

(kagome’s point of view)

Sitting in the room feeling mixed emotions, I sighed. Everything was happening so fast and I had no control over it. Almost as if I was a puppet in someone's dreams or maybe their universe. Just so they could get the satisfaction of ruining someone's life. Or maybe I wasn't good enough, just another lost soul in the world that had no idea what was out there. These thoughts ran through my mind on a daily basis. Almost as if they wanted to haunt me in my sleep. But I keep wondering, if it was so bad would I ever get a second chance. Or am I doomed to be a failure in my family? Loneliness soon washed over my mind.

“Why was it me to be lonely in this damned world, I know I must have failed as a princess. A demon wouldn't dare set foot in our castle after what they all have found out. I would never trust a male again after what he did to me, I thought you are a spouse to love your mate not treat her like some common whore. Father knows I wasn’t going to like that guy, why does he hate me so much? Was it because I reminded him of mother, or that I wasn't able to hold up to her standard? After my mother left him for some human he just sees me as her and it's not fair! He knows I can do better than her in so many ways. I wouldn't dare try most of the things that she did to ruin the family's reputation. But still, he treats me as a kid he was forced to take care of, I can never trust a male again! I can never trust another woman or being either. No matter what people always show their true colors. I rather die than get married to another insult to the demonkind. Or someone that thinks that women are nothing but a powerful tool to boost their self-esteem”                                                                                                                                                             I slowly looked up from my desk by the window, as tears rolled down my eyes. I raised my right hand to wipe away a tear from my face.                                     

After a few moments of silence, there came two knocks from her oak wood door.                                                                                    “Yes, I called out”, My voice was still a bit shaky after having my meltdown. I didn't expect any visitors today. Nor did I want to be bothered by anyone. The door opened revealing one of the servants that served her tribe.

“The king has summoned you to his studies my princess.” one of the servants said. She was a young girl with maple brown hair that hung down in a long braid down her back. Standing back up straight she waited for me to follow her.

I got up from my desk and slowly walked to the door, knowing that my father had no good news for me. When did he have anything exciting for me anymore was the real question. Walking over to the servant she led me to my father's studies. The hallway seemed so longer than usual hanging up paintings that didn't really appeal to the eye. Anyone who walked through the halls of the building could tell that it was a male-dominated palace now. Holding such a  feeble princess as herself. Finally, at the door the servant stopped and bowed to me before disappearing, I wished that she hadn't left me. Maybe because I felt so comfortable with another female around, I should not be this scared to meet my own blood. I raised my delicate pale hand up to ‘knock on the door waiting for a response to go and enter. Only hoping that he would show me any other emotion than hatred and pity.