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Bad Advice Column
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TOPIC: Bad Advice Column
#70503
Calypso
Inuyoukai
Posts: 280
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 7
Drop him on a treadmill running at 15km/h. Make sure he can't get off, and watch while he miraculously slims down!

I need to take my macaw to trims his wings, but he's being extremely nasty. What should I do?
 
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I claimed the Sesshoumaru STRUT in the claim game!
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#70504
naqaashi
Shrine Girl
Posts: 664
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 34
Apply a pair of garden shears.

I need to learn how to drive, but the traffic in the city scares me. What do I do?
 
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I claimed Sesshoumaru\'s dismembered left arm in the Dokuga Claim Game.

Master Weird-Outer of Dokuga. My tool of choice? A sentient sewing machine called Lord Ew that likes to spew technicoloured handkerchiefs embellished with the stuff that nightmares and crack-fics are made of.
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#70507
Lily Noir
Inuyoukai
Posts: 244
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 11
Take a bazooka with you and blow up every car in your way.

I haven't slept more than 5h in the last week, and I'm barely conscious now, but I still don't want to go to bed. What should I do?
 
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#70508
sugar0o
Destroyer of Boxes
Posts: 2929
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 199
Go to the Store, buy Extra strong coffee - brew it, a case of 5150 Semi Sweet, a pack of No Doz, Mix it all together, and then drink like half, you wont be sleepy at all at that point! in fact you probably wont remember what sleep is so there's no need to worry about it.

I was planning on sleeping in today, but my puppy had other ideas, now stuck kinda awake, what should i do?
 
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Last Edit: 2011/09/17 08:26 By sugar0o.
 
We all have our demons, I named mine r0o.
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#70509
Calypso
Inuyoukai
Posts: 280
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 7
Pour a bottle of sleeping pills down your throat! You'll be out like a light!

I've got an important appointment for dinner tomorrow, but I forgot I was supposed to be babysitting. What should I do?
 
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I claimed the Sesshoumaru STRUT in the claim game!
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#70516
Lily Noir
Inuyoukai
Posts: 244
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 11
Ship the kid off to the dinner and stay at home eating chips and writing fanfiction.

I finally got a few hours of sleep in, but now it's late and I can't fall asleep. What should I do?
 
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#70528
Etain
Pup
Posts: 28
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 0
you should drink a 6 pack of energy drinks and eat a lot of sugary snacks :]


I ate so much food now that i'm tired but i'm wide awake at the same time. What do i do?
 
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I claimed Koume\\\\\\\'s Demon cat Kuroro in the claim game !!! -drawing coming soon 2011-


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#70590
Calypso
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 7
To get rid of the tiredness, pour a bucket of ice and water on yourself. To get rid of the awakeness, apply a well-placed mallet to the skull.

I've got a really bad case of the flu and finals are coming up. What should I do?
 
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Last Edit: 2011/09/21 08:14 By Calypso.
 
Join the Around the World Challenge! You can find it in the forums ^^

I claimed the Sesshoumaru STRUT in the claim game!
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#70603
Lily Noir
Inuyoukai
Posts: 244
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 11
Infect everyone with it and make sure everyone is in bed in time for the tests.

I've been trying to upload a video on youtube but it's been f*#$% with me for the past hour and a half and refusing to upload. I'm at my wit's end, what sould I do?
 
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#70991
insomniac_amy
Shrine Girl
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 76
The problem is probably your computer so what you should do is first pour a bucket of water over it and then kick it several times wearing work boots. Now wait 5 minutes then repeat until it lets you upload your video

I need new glasses, what should I do?
 
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I claimed Shippo`s mushroom in the claim game.

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
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#70993
Dolly Dolphin
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 1
Get tape, a wire hanger, bend the wire hanger itno the desired glass shape you want and then use the tape for the lenses. Viola, a new pair of glasses. Or you could remover your eyes but that would be a lot of blood to clean up.

The sound in one of ear buds has gone out but the other side still works. How do I fix this problem?
 
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The dolphin demon who love Sesshomaru.

If life gives you lemons make lemonade.
I claimed Naraku's curly hair because he stole it from me years ago in the claim game.
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#71497
Lily Noir
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 11
Rip off the one that still works and closely inspect it (inside and out). Thouroughly memorise every tiny thing in there and what it does, then procede to check whats wrong with the other one. When you're done go to the store and buy new ones (identical to the ones you have)to harvest spare parts from.

I'm hungry but nauseous, what should I do?
 
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#71603
insomniac_amy
Shrine Girl
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 76
Take some ipecac syrup for the nausea and then hurry and eat everything you can.

My favorite cd has some scratches on it and skips what should I do?
 
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I claimed Shippo`s mushroom in the claim game.

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
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#71606
Mamasama
Supporter
Posts: 186
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 17
Resign yourself to a life without music...

or

learn to love the strange new rhythm and odd repetitions and invent a whole new genre of music.... Oh wait...dubstep has already been invented

>.>

My toilet is clogged with too much TP...what do I do???
 
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Amy
Mamasama


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#71616
Lily Noir
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 11
Drop a bowling ball in it and hope gravity does it's thing.

I'm having the hiccups, what should I do?
 
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#71617
FantomuAiShi
Pup
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 9
Drink a bottle of hot sauce and hope that it's hot enough to get rid of hiccup!

I'm having problems to get myself to write. What should I do?
 
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#71627
Tsuki Ai
Inuyoukai
Posts: 285
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 4
Write whatever comes to mind no matter what it is then post it.

I'm stuck in a room with a kitten that keeps meowing to get outside the room, but there's a dog in the house. What ever should I do?
 
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#71638
Lily Noir
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 11
Get some radioactive material and dump it on the kitten. Wait for the changes to take place and let 'er rip.

I have massive writers block, how do I set rid of it?
 
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#71683
Jade-ed Fang
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 5
Get someone to knock you unconsious with a frying pan. Maybe that will get your muse up!

I want a ferret.... but.. ferrets are banned in my country what should I do?
 
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#71811
Tsuki Ai
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 4
Sneak him in, in a hollow basketball. Then if someone finds out, kill them.

I don't want to go to class tomorrow.
 
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#71821
Dolly Dolphin
Inuyoukai
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 1
Then go to the beach or any body of water deep enough so you can piss of a life guard and go directly to jail without passing go and getting $200. Oh and while all that is happening there is a party going on at school but you will also fail life.

How do I speed up time?
 
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The dolphin demon who love Sesshomaru.

If life gives you lemons make lemonade.
I claimed Naraku's curly hair because he stole it from me years ago in the claim game.
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#71826
insomniac_amy
Shrine Girl
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 76
Take several NoDoz and then drink 12 red bulls and drink 2 full pots of expresso, it will help speed time up.

I headache that won't go away, what should I do?
 
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I claimed Shippo`s mushroom in the claim game.

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.
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#71853
Red
Whelp
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 3 Months ago Karma: 6
Smash your toe, and break your fingers you will forget you even had the headache.

I have can't find clean underwear what should I do?
 
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I claim Byakuya paper crane in the claim game.
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#72381
MissKatt
Taiyoukai
Posts: 499
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 2 Months ago Karma: 32
Sniff every pair you own until you find the one that smells the least.

I can't scratch my back, help?
 
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#72401
Tsuki Ai
Inuyoukai
Posts: 285
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Re:Bad Advice Column 6 Years, 2 Months ago Karma: 4
Find an angry cat and let them do it.

I don't want to work next week...What can I do?
 
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